Adice Sought: Witnessing dangerous psychopathy

[GioTav4]

Hi All!

I would really appreciate it if you could share your thoughts on this situation I have, for I am truly frustrated and lost. :-(

I recently broke up with someone who may not only be a Psychopath, but has the makings of one who can be very, very dangerous. He is HIV+ and uses this as a tool to exact "revenge" and vent out a disturbingly bottomless anger that exists and operates without the slightest of provocations.

He cruises malls daily where he lures young male students for casual sex, and I even caught him one time "watching" (I could not be sure if he was participating) a 6 year old boy being molested by an adult (the boy's father it seemed) inside a restroom cubicle at a rest stop. When he does something wrong, he prays to God and says that it was for the best, and/or giggles when he is confronted.

For three years I was the only witness to (and many times, recipient of) a variety of disturbing traits and actions, but I only became aware of psychopathy (in the true clinical sense) a few weeks ago, when I was researching online for a framework that explained his many forms of covert cruelty. Prior to this, I thought he simply suffered from "sex addiction" (a condition he declared he had very early on in the relationship), but I was always at a loss when I sought to use addiction to explain other disturbing and cruel acts.

Questions:
(1) Authorities view my situation as simply a domestic-battery issue. How can I convince them that they might be dealing with a sexually violent psychopath?

(2) police have focused only on the acts he has done which I can prove, and they refuse to profile this person. What do I do to present psychopathy as a valid and even bigger security threat?

(3) What are the right government agencies to approach, who will treat this information more seriously?

(4) Do mental health institutions step in during these situations?

Thanks in advance!
Gio

[Bluefox]

Police can't do anything about someone who hasn't come to their attention, they have to do something wrong, there has to be witnesses, proof etc. Calling it domestic, they may think you're just out for some revenge on an x-boyfriend!

However, it is illegal i'm sure to have unprotected sex when you are HIV, people have been charged & convicted on this. But, you have to have witnesses, i.e. the people he had sex with and deliberately so, knowing he is HIV. So you'd have to start with those people, maybe get some advice from a clinic on what your next move should be. Sorry this was right out the top of my head, hope it helps.

(It may start the ball rolling, then if he's psychotic as you say, it's all gonna come out in the wash:

[Liam1306]

Many LE personnel fail and refuse to acknowledge domestic violence in any relationship; it has to be provoked.

Most states/countries abide by international laws on human rights to address and prevent same.

If you would break out a current Diagnostic Statistical Manual (American Psychiatric Association) at the library you might re-classify your ex as a sadist.

It does not bode well that two adults in a relationship "allegedly observe a child being molested" and did nothing.

It sounds like your "breakup" is reawakening your heart.

Talk to some Aids Counselors; they deal with the significant others, families, and friends of those with AIDS.

Your ex's feelings are not uncommon; it is his personality, attitude and behavior which are dangerous, to you, children and the public.

[SamiraSlim]

I am so sorry that you had to have through this. I would do exactly what bluefox stated. Asked a Aids Counselor. That is true you do go to jail especially if you intentionally give it to people. My prayers are with you.!!!!!!!!!!!

[skybludeb]

Originally Posted by GioTav4

Hi All!

I would really appreciate it if you could share your thoughts on this situation I have, for I am truly frustrated and lost. :-(

I recently broke up with someone who may not only be a Psychopath, but has the makings of one who can be very, very dangerous. He is HIV+ and uses this as a tool to exact "revenge" and vent out a disturbingly bottomless anger that exists and operates without the slightest of provocations.

He cruises malls daily where he lures young male students for casual sex, and I even caught him one time "watching" (I could not be sure if he was participating) a 6 year old boy being molested by an adult (the boy's father it seemed) inside a restroom cubicle at a rest stop. When he does something wrong, he prays to God and says that it was for the best, and/or giggles when he is confronted.

For three years I was the only witness to (and many times, recipient of) a variety of disturbing traits and actions, but I only became aware of psychopathy (in the true clinical sense) a few weeks ago, when I was researching online for a framework that explained his many forms of covert cruelty. Prior to this, I thought he simply suffered from "sex addiction" (a condition he declared he had very early on in the relationship), but I was always at a loss when I sought to use addiction to explain other disturbing and cruel acts.

Questions:
(1) Authorities view my situation as simply a domestic-battery issue. How can I convince them that they might be dealing with a sexually violent psychopath?

(2) police have focused only on the acts he has done which I can prove, and they refuse to profile this person. What do I do to present psychopathy as a valid and even bigger security threat?

(3) What are the right government agencies to approach, who will treat this information more seriously?

(4) Do mental health institutions step in during these situations?

Thanks in advance!
Gio

What did you do when you caught him watching a father molest his son, Did you call the police or just let that happen to that little boy? if you did nothing then I think you also have issues

[etphoto]

Bluefox's advise is sound. Having unprotected sex while being HIV+ is against the law (in every state if know of) if the person's partner is unaware. If I were in your shoes and willing to take action, I'd locate the sexual partners. Find out if they knew your ex was HIV+ and if they didn't, it would be up to them to report it to the police (if they care).

I worked a case similar to this several year ago when the suspect was secretly video taping himself having sex with a number of different men. The person that found the tapes knew the suspect was HIV+ and reported the acts to police. Out of the 6 different men in the tapes, only one wanted to prosecute. The rest didn't care (scratching my head in disbelief).

ET

[Liam1306]

Health and Human Services Department/Infectious Disease Control..?

Make and appointment, go in and talk to your Dr.

[Wichita]

First, has a crime been committed? If you, or any other person, consents to bondage, humiliation, pain and suffering, for the sexual gratification of yourself or him, then there is no crime. If he forces you to suffer pain, humiliation, or other sadistic acts, and you have not consented, then it is sexual assault. If he is HIV +, and does not tell his partner, nor take any precautions, he is committing a crime whether or not both parties consent. Of course, if none of the victims are known, that is, cannot be questioned by police, there will be no violation because there is no victim.

As far as your own situation with him is concerned, if he is stalking you, there is only a restraining order, or protection order that can be served upon him. Once that order is served, he can be arrested for contempt of court for violating the order. At the very least, report your situation to the police by calling them and asking them for a "patrol check" of your residence. Explain the situation to them, and ask them how to obtain a restraining/protection order. Be prepared to suffer "homophobic" attitudes from the police unless you are very fortunate, and they are well trained professionals.

Without specific details of the type of behavior you have witnessed, it is difficult to say whether he is sadistic, or just anti-social. Someone else suggested the Diagnostic Manual of Mental Disorders. That is good advice, as you can read the clinical definitions, and symptoms of various disorders. Be aware that he may suffer from several, and the terminology used will require some research on your part so as not to be confused. This manual is written by very experienced and educated practitioners for practitioners. It is difficult, but not impossible, to arrive at a concrete conclusion as to his specific pathology without clinical experience. So, be careful with your analysis. The main thing is to learn enough that you can take the necessary steps for self defense. Which brings me to another subject, self defense. Research the self defense law in your jurisdiction, and learn how to legally defend yourself if he is stalking you. As far as the 6 year old being "pimped" by his father, you need to report this to the police to protect the little boy. He deserves the right to grow up without thinking it normal that grown men want to fellate him in public restrooms. Wouldn't you agree? Consenting adults is one thing, fleecing the lambs is another.

[Wichita]

Additional Information: The police won't "profile" him, primarily because they are not qualified to do so. You would have to speak directly with a detective that is trained for investigating sexually sadistic offenders. If you live in a large city, this is possible. The smaller the jurisdiction, the less frequent officers come across this type of training and activity.

Psychopathy is not easy to diagnose, and requires specific testing by a qualified psychologist. Read Dr. Robert Hare's book "Without Conscience". It will give you a pretty good idea of what you are dealing with.

Local police officers have the proper jurisdiction to investigate your complaints. Social service agencies won't be able to help you, except where your own pathology as a result of the relationship is concerned. No one can intervene with him until he commits a crime for which conviction could send him to prison. That is why I suggested you report the situation with the little boy. I don't know where it happened, or if it happened in the same jurisdiction where you live, or even if the boy could be identified somehow. If possible, that is the quickest way to get the attention of the authorities.

Mental health professionals and institutions cannot, and will not intervene. People must either enter treatment under their own consent, or be court ordered to treatment. Court ordered treatment occurs mostly after a conviction. Lawful commitment to an institution is a very complicated process that requires documented evidence that the person is a danger to himself or others. Even a qualified diagnosis of psychopathy or sadism is not sufficient for a court ordered commitment to an institution. There must be the imminent danger possibility of harm to himself or others, such as suicide, or attempted homicide.

[Liam1306]

Please upadate your situation, as you have ignited our concers, but have yet to quench our same!

[lorettalockhorn]

Liam, this sounds like an Elaborate Scenario Troll to me.

Then again, I suppose it's possible that such a caring person is also completely clueless.

[BeastofBears]

Originally Posted by lorettalockhorn

Liam, this sounds like an Elaborate Scenario Troll to me.

Then again, I suppose it's possible that such a caring person is also completely clueless.

I'm with you on point #1, imo.

[beemer]

Count me in as well. So many holes in that story one could shoot a canon thru. Doesn't add up. MOO

[lorettalockhorn]

Originally Posted by beemer

Count me in as well. So many holes in that story one could shoot a canon thru. Doesn't add up. MOO

This may be a case of 1 + 1 = 1

[beemer]

[Eagle1]

Originally Posted by skybludeb

What did you do when you caught him watching a father molest his son, Did you call the police or just let that happen to that little boy? if you did nothing then I think you also have issues

Good question. Where were you when you observed this and why was that father doing it in front of a witness or witnesses?

Does your cell phone take pictures and do you carry it with you? I'd think you may be getting into some dangerous-to-you situations, btw. How come you're so frequently around this kind of people?