You can help us save our kids. Some ideas on what you can do and advice from posters!

[sharlock]

Every 40 seconds another child goes missing in America and if that child is not found in the first 3hrs their chance of survival drops by 77%.

"All Adam's small life we taught him not to take candy from strangers, all the things that we thought were appropriate. But we also taught him to respect authority figures unequivocally: that he should be a little gentleman. I think if we had put more emphasis on the fact that he had a right to say "no," maybe the outcome of his case might have been different... He might have been alive today if he wasn't such a little gentleman."
John Walsh "How to raise a streetsmart kid" HBO

There are some fantastic resources out there for parents and teachers that can help correct the errors taught in Stranger Danger lessons. Our kids do not understand that a child abductor is not necessarily mean and ugly looking with a beard and glasses. That it could even be someone they know. One site I downloaded a free dvd and lesson plan to teach this was great and not scary at all. My son loved it especially the song and dance and this is the link if you want to check it out.
http://www.yellodyno.com/TrickyPeopleTeacherSample.HTML

You guys are so lucky to have an amber alert we have nothing as sophisticated here; I wonder though how many have signed up to receive the free amber alerts to their mobiles? By signing up you could help recover an abducted child before it is to late.

https://www.wirelessamberalerts.org/index.jsp

I have opened this thread in the hopes that we can all collaberate and share advice and suggestions on how to keep our children out of harms way!
Sharlock For the parents of missing kids my heart goes out to you and your loved one.

[sharlock]

Since amber alerts have been started over 328 chiildren have been saved by them!!
-All children should be taught to memorize thier name, address and phone number.
-If you have children you should keep current photographs of them.
-Safeguard kids on the net, you need to monitor thier internet use.
-Teach your kids to say no to adults that are making them feel uncomfortable or touching them in a way that they don't feel is right.
-If your kids are going out tell them not to go anywhere alone and to let an adult know where they are.
-Be sceptical of people with vague stories about absent parents or children who tell of mysterious parent deaths or separations without contacts they might represent abductions.

[sharlock]

If you would like to receive an e-mail notifying you when a South Dakota Amber Alerts is declared, updated, or canceled click here to sign up.
http://www.state.sd.us/amberalert/
How is Amber Alert started? It is started by an individual reporting an abduction to their local law enforcement agency.

The criteria for declaring an Amber Alert is as follows:

• The request to declare an Amber Alert must come from a Law Enforcement Agency.
• There must be credible evidence that a child under 18 years old has been abducted.
• There must be evidence that the child is in danger of bodily harm or death.
• There must be enough credible and useful information from eyewitnesses or other sources that could assist in the safe recovery of the child and arrest of the suspect.

<applet code="NCMECbanner.class" codebase="http://banner.missingkids.com/java/" align="baseline" hspace="8" width="342" height="128"> </applet>

Just copy and paste to view.
Please check this link regularly it will update an run continuously 12 photographs of missing children. only current info will be displayed on it. You could save a childs life!!!

[sharlock]

Quote:
Originally Posted by Jayelles
When I was a little girl, we used to play the game "pass it on". Someone would make up a story, tell one person and say "pass it on" and we'd see how far the story would spread.

A week ago, little Madeline McCann was abducted from her hotel room in The Algarve, Portugal whilst her parents ate their evening meal closeby within the hotel complex. They are a very nice family and Madeline's father is a respected cardiologist. He and his wife had been taking it turns to check on their children at half hourly intervals.

Portugese law prevents the police from discussing the investigation - even with the parents of the missing child. Also, such crimes are rare in Portugal and it would appear that the police are under-resourced and under-experienced in dealing with this crime. Experts have been flown in from other countries to help.

It is now felt that she may have been taken out of the country. A Scottish businessman has put up £1 million (almost $2 million) as a reward for information leading to Madeline's return. International footballers David Beckham and Reynaldo (sp) have made TV appeals for her safe return.

A group of volunteers have set up a webpage with the aim of spreading Madeline's photo and the tipline numbers are globally as possible.

www.findmadeline.com

Here is a link to a new story (with other links):-

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/uk/6645341.stm

Click on the link in my signature for the website dedicated to finding Madeline.

In these cases, we often feel helpless. As parents we cannot begin to imagine the horror of having your child abducted and not knowing whether they are alive or dead or what horrors they may be enduring. It is agnonising for us to watch the tv appeals of parents who are suffering our worst nightmare.

However, there IS something that everyone can do - we can "pass it on" - i.e. spread the word. If everyone could post the link to the www.findmadeline.com website just once to ANY other forum with the request for others to do the same, word will spread quickly.

Internet communities CAN help!

[sharlock]

If you are trapped in an abductor's car:

• Don't sit there quietly. The person is taking you somewhere and wants to hurt you.
  
  
• If the car has back doors, try to scramble quickly to the back seat while the car is moving.
  
  
• Try to jump out of a car that is going slow or has to stop. Try to open a window and scream.
  
  
• Try to reach over and blow the horn, or grab the steering wheel. Scream as loud as you can while you do this.
  
  
• If the car is stopped or slowed behind another car, reach over with your foot and quickly stomp on the gas pedal as hard and as long as you can.
  
  
• This is a time you will be much safer if you cause an accident than if you behave.

Safety at Home

• Many kids get home before their parents. If you come home before your mom or dad, make sure the first thing you do is call and let your mom or dad know you got home okay.
  
  
• If you come home and a window in your house is broken or a door is open that shouldn't be, don't go in. Go to a trusted neighbor, or find a phone and call 911.
  
  
• If you have to stay after school or want to play or study with a friend, tell your mom or dad.
  
  
• Don't leave your home without asking your mom or dad first. Make sure a parent knows where you are going and for how long. Always tell your mom or dad where you will be and when you will be home.
  
  
• When your family is home and the doorbell rings, always find out who it is and ask your mom or dad before you open the door.
  
  
• If you are home alone, never open the door -- unless you can see that it is a relative or a specific person who your mom or dad said would come over to stay with you.
  
  
• NEVER tell someone you are home alone, whether they call on the phone or come by your house. Ask your mom or dad what they would like you to say, like: "My Dad's in the shower, can he call you when he gets out?"
  
  
• NEVER give information to anyone over the phone about yourself, your family or where you live. Hang up on anyone who calls to bother you or who says bad things on the phone.
  
  
• Ask your mom or dad for permission to go outside of your play area or yard or to go into someone's home.
  
  
• If you have a babysitter that hits you, touches you or makes you play games that embarrass you, tell a trusted adult, even if the babysitter told you not to.
  
  
• Keep all the windows and doors in your home locked.
  
  
• If someone tries to break into your home, call 911 immediately and give them your full address, including your apartment number if you have one. Tell them that you are at home and someone is trying to break in. Then, try calling a neighbor you know is usually home. If you can get out of the house, get out. If you can hide, hide.

This is a really informative site I have pasted the link if anyone would like to see more.
http://usfweb2.usf.edu/advocacy/kidstips.htm

[sharlock]

Student fights off abductor

Robyn Ironside
May 23, 2007 06:24am
Article from: Courier Mail


A 12-YEAR-OLD boy has escaped his abductor by flicking him in the face with his house keys.
About 3:30 yesterday afternoon, the boy was opening the gate to his house in Sinnamon Park when a car pulled up.

The male driver opened his door, held out a street directory and said something to the boy.

He walked over to help, and the man reached out and dragged the boy into the car by his arm.

He slowly drove away, but the child fought back and managed to escape by using his keys to flick the man in the face.

Police are looking for a man described as Caucasian, in his late 20s, with a muscular build and black collar length scruffy hair.

He was wearing large round sunglasses, a collarless grey button up business or sweatshirt with the sleeves rolled up, long thick trousers and formal black shoes.

The man possibly has a gold or metallic crown on his front teeth.
It is believed he was driving a 1999 model white Holden Commodore.
Any information to Crimestoppers 1800 333 000.



#lead-group {background:transparent url("/common/imagedata/0,,5494808,00.jpg") no-repeat 0 0;}TOTAL_IMAGES = 1;
Image 2 of 2
WANTED man ... police have released this comfit of a man wanted over the attack on a boy, 12.

[sharlock]

teramiabullfrog vbmenu_register("postmenu_8861922", true);
Member
Join Date: Mar 2007
Posts: 63



posting madeleine's missing child flyer
california is a long way from where Madeleine McCann disappeared; however, volunteers of the Finding Our Children Under Stress (F.O.C.U.S.) Organization printed copies of her flyer, laminated two of them and taped them on the outside windows of our missing child mobile awareness center van, as well as included copies of her flyer in our 3-ring missing child display binder and left them for display in post offices along California's west coast. anyone can help, print a flyer of her from her web page, take it to your local post office and ask the post master or station master to post and display her flyer in the post office lobby, in accordance with the Presidential Memorandum, signed by then President William Clinton on 1/19/96, every building owned or controlled by the federal government is required to maintain a display area for the general public to view missing person notices. nobody knows where this little girl is so as many places her flyer is posted the better. every time we stopped at a post office or store, people crowded around our van to view the laminated flyers (other flyers on the van include the current active amber alert cases as well as the flyers for two missing who's family post here on crimelibrary forum, and several other missing who's family we've been helping distribute and post flyers for, for years). the U.S. has some wonderful federal laws and federal programs to both help find short and long term missing persons as well as to help teach child abduction prevention; unfortunately, most of the laws and programs are not managed at the level of efficiency they were originally intended, instructed, and are annually federal funded; therefore, they are not accomplishing what they were designed to accomplish. We realize Madeleine McCann is not from the U.S.; however, missing children/persons is a global problem and every source of service offered and available to help find a missing person needs to be tapped, she could be anywhere, and everyone, everywhere, should get involved and help bring this child back home to her loved ones. another of those think globally and act locally situations.

I had to add this great post from termiabullfrog as it has some really interesting points that I know I was not aware of and that is the whole point of this thread; I am sure that many people have some great thoughts or advisce for others but we tend to believe that others already know what we know. This is not the case and we should share our insights so everyone is aware of how we can help or prevent children abductions. I would love to see others add some advice to this thread but even if they don't I intend to keep adding the info as I find it so hopefully we all become more aware and might even prevent a tragedy!

[teramiabullfrog]

first, thanks for the compliments on the post. over the past thirteen years i've been one of many volunteers of the Finding Our Children Under Stress (F.O.C.U.S.) Organization. as part of this organization's mission to help find and prevent missing children, we've traveled through eight western states and one east coast state. we've traveled in five different donated vehicles over those years (mostly windowed cargo vans). color, laminated, photo flyers of missing persons are displayed in all the cargo-area-windows (the current van has the laminated flyers taped to the outside of the tinted windows). we've been part of over 1,000 county fairs, regional festivals, NASCAR races, car shows, and/or other high attendance events, with our "MAC SHACK" (mobile awareness center about missing children and child abduction prevention). we've distributed and posted millions of missing children/person flyers. part of the program is to stop in every town, at every post office, as we travel from fair to fair. we've stopped at over 2,000 post offices, and we now leave a 3-ring display binder, with sheet protectors, containing over 100 missing person notices (including all the "current amber alert" cases). whenever, and wherever, we stop people stand around the van reading the missing person flyer info and the "four rules" of the "BE SMART-KNOW THE RULES-CAMPAIGN", which we have laminated and taped to the outside windows around the cargo area. we have a small trailer (a donated 54 ford truck trailer bed converted with a trailer hitch, and camper shell) filled with all the supplies needed to set-up a vendor style fair booth (10'X10' canopy style booth, foldable tables and chairs, sign-age {"F.O.C.U.S. Organization - a 501(c)(3) non profit charity"},
a "high-striker" very popular children's carnival type game in the shape of a giraffe {Geraldine the child abduction prevention safety giraffe - as many as 1,500 children ring the bell on the giraffe over a four day county fair}, donated prizes for our children's prize table, free literature about child abduction prevention, hundreds of copies of different missing children flyers, etc. are all hauled in this small trailer). we've talked to hundreds of thousands (if not millions) of people over these years and everyone agrees the missing persons problems in this country and globally need to be solved. everyone that reads, or we explain, the history about the federal funded studies (during the 80's and 90's), that led to the creation and development of the national laws and programs (regarding finding and preventing missing persons) agrees the laws and programs need to be managed, by the federal elected officials and federal agencies responsible for their management, so that they function at the level of efficiency they were originally intended, instructed, and are annually funded. after they see copies of the Presidential Memorandum (1/19/96) that established some of these federal programs, and they see copies of the instructions describing who is responsible and how these laws and programs are to be managed, they are convinced something needs to be done to fix the problem with the fed laws and fed programs so they are functioning at the level of efficiency they are intended and instructed. and, it's a simple communication fix between federal employees in different federal departments that would be needed. registered letters, regular mail letters, e-mails, and "comments" on the "contact us" portion of the web pages for federal agencies and federal elected officials, have been sent over the past twelve years (informing them of our findings, and what needs to be done to insure, and give comfort to the families of the missing, that everything that can be done, and is suppose to be done, to help find their missing loved ones, is being done), and we've never received a reply back from any of them (from the president on down), and most of the federal laws and federal programs (at least, pertaining to missing children problems) are not operating at their intended efficiency, and are therefore under-utilized. since the volunteers of F.O.C.U.S. travel along the same eight western state route we stop at the same post offices annually (over 2,000). most of the missing person display binders we leave at the post offices are still there when we return with the new yearly updated version (missing who have been found alive stamped "located", those who's remains were found stamped "recovered" - the same wording used in search and rescue work after a catastrophic disaster {the NCMEC indicates any missing found as "recovered", whether they were found alive or not}). however, we have been told by the postal employees, at the post offices where the binders are missing, that the post master told them to remove it from the post office lobby and keep it behind the counter only showing it to people who ask for it - this is not the way the 1/19/96 Presidential Memorandum intended or is it the way the instructions read (for the NALC/USPS CHILD ALERT PROGRAM and the instructions for "the display of missing children postal bulletin monthly notices". Some of the other federal laws and federal programs not being managed according to the original intent, instructions, and annual funding include: Kristen's Law (which established the federal funding for the National Clearinghouse for Missing Adults - funding has been slashed over the past several years so their staff has gone from thirteen to three), Jennifer's Law (which established the requirement that all coroners in the country must cross-reference any unidentified "john" or "jane" doe with the missing persons files before burial in a paupers "unidentified" grave - the wording was changed from the original language of this law so it is only "suggested" coroners do this cross reference - therefore, unidentified bodies are still being buried without any cross-referencing, and families of the missing may never know if their missing loved one has been buried somewhere), Amber Alert (if the "Emergency Missing Child E-Mail Supplement" to the Child Alert Program was managed at it's intended efficiency the Amber Alert would be greatly improved (within 24 hours of a reported endangered missing child every post office in the country would have a display of the victim's poster in the "box" section of the post office lobby and in the workroom floor area so every postal carrier would be able to see the flyer before and after his/her route. THE MISMANAGEMENT OF THE FEDERAL LAWS AND FEDERAL PROGRAMS PERTAINING TO THE MISSING IS TO THE MISSING AND THEIR FAMILIES, WHAT THE MISMANAGEMENT OF WALTER REED HOSPITAL AND VETERAN BENEFITS IS TO DISABLED VETS AND THEIR FAMILIES. THE MISSING AND THEIR FAMILIES ARE THE VICTIMS OF A CATASTROPHIC DISASTER.

[sharlock]

Originally Posted by teramiabullfrog

first, thanks for the compliments on the post. over the past thirteen years i've been one of many volunteers of the Finding Our Children Under Stress (F.O.C.U.S.) Organization. as part of this organization's mission to help find and prevent missing children, we've traveled through eight western states and one east coast state. we've traveled in five different donated vehicles over those years (mostly windowed cargo vans). color, laminated, photo flyers of missing persons are displayed in all the cargo-area-windows (the current van has the laminated flyers taped to the outside of the tinted windows). we've been part of over 1,000 county fairs, regional festivals, NASCAR races, car shows, and/or other high attendance events, with our "MAC SHACK" (mobile awareness center about missing children and child abduction prevention). we've distributed and posted millions of missing children/person flyers. part of the program is to stop in every town, at every post office, as we travel from fair to fair. we've stopped at over 2,000 post offices, and we now leave a 3-ring display binder, with sheet protectors, containing over 100 missing person notices (including all the "current amber alert" cases). whenever, and wherever, we stop people stand around the van reading the missing person flyer info and the "four rules" of the "BE SMART-KNOW THE RULES-CAMPAIGN", which we have laminated and taped to the outside windows around the cargo area. we have a small trailer (a donated 54 ford truck trailer bed converted with a trailer hitch, and camper shell) filled with all the supplies needed to set-up a vendor style fair booth (10'X10' canopy style booth, foldable tables and chairs, sign-age {"F.O.C.U.S. Organization - a 501(c)(3) non profit charity"},
a "high-striker" very popular children's carnival type game in the shape of a giraffe {Geraldine the child abduction prevention safety giraffe - as many as 1,500 children ring the bell on the giraffe over a four day county fair}, donated prizes for our children's prize table, free literature about child abduction prevention, hundreds of copies of different missing children flyers, etc. are all hauled in this small trailer). we've talked to hundreds of thousands (if not millions) of people over these years and everyone agrees the missing persons problems in this country and globally need to be solved. everyone that reads, or we explain, the history about the federal funded studies (during the 80's and 90's), that led to the creation and development of the national laws and programs (regarding finding and preventing missing persons) agrees the laws and programs need to be managed, by the federal elected officials and federal agencies responsible for their management, so that they function at the level of efficiency they were originally intended, instructed, and are annually funded. after they see copies of the Presidential Memorandum (1/19/96) that established some of these federal programs, and they see copies of the instructions describing who is responsible and how these laws and programs are to be managed, they are convinced something needs to be done to fix the problem with the fed laws and fed programs so they are functioning at the level of efficiency they are intended and instructed. and, it's a simple communication fix between federal employees in different federal departments that would be needed. registered letters, regular mail letters, e-mails, and "comments" on the "contact us" portion of the web pages for federal agencies and federal elected officials, have been sent over the past twelve years (informing them of our findings, and what needs to be done to insure, and give comfort to the families of the missing, that everything that can be done, and is suppose to be done, to help find their missing loved ones, is being done), and we've never received a reply back from any of them (from the president on down), and most of the federal laws and federal programs (at least, pertaining to missing children problems) are not operating at their intended efficiency, and are therefore under-utilized. since the volunteers of F.O.C.U.S. travel along the same eight western state route we stop at the same post offices annually (over 2,000). most of the missing person display binders we leave at the post offices are still there when we return with the new yearly updated version (missing who have been found alive stamped "located", those who's remains were found stamped "recovered" - the same wording used in search and rescue work after a catastrophic disaster {the NCMEC indicates any missing found as "recovered", whether they were found alive or not}). however, we have been told by the postal employees, at the post offices where the binders are missing, that the post master told them to remove it from the post office lobby and keep it behind the counter only showing it to people who ask for it - this is not the way the 1/19/96 Presidential Memorandum intended or is it the way the instructions read (for the NALC/USPS CHILD ALERT PROGRAM and the instructions for "the display of missing children postal bulletin monthly notices". Some of the other federal laws and federal programs not being managed according to the original intent, instructions, and annual funding include: Kristen's Law (which established the federal funding for the National Clearinghouse for Missing Adults - funding has been slashed over the past several years so their staff has gone from thirteen to three), Jennifer's Law (which established the requirement that all coroners in the country must cross-reference any unidentified "john" or "jane" doe with the missing persons files before burial in a paupers "unidentified" grave - the wording was changed from the original language of this law so it is only "suggested" coroners do this cross reference - therefore, unidentified bodies are still being buried without any cross-referencing, and families of the missing may never know if their missing loved one has been buried somewhere), Amber Alert (if the "Emergency Missing Child E-Mail Supplement" to the Child Alert Program was managed at it's intended efficiency the Amber Alert would be greatly improved (within 24 hours of a reported endangered missing child every post office in the country would have a display of the victim's poster in the "box" section of the post office lobby and in the workroom floor area so every postal carrier would be able to see the flyer before and after his/her route. THE MISMANAGEMENT OF THE FEDERAL LAWS AND FEDERAL PROGRAMS PERTAINING TO THE MISSING IS TO THE MISSING AND THEIR FAMILIES, WHAT THE MISMANAGEMENT OF WALTER REED HOSPITAL AND VETERAN BENEFITS IS TO DISABLED VETS AND THEIR FAMILIES. THE MISSING AND THEIR FAMILIES ARE THE VICTIMS OF A CATASTROPHIC DISASTER.

What an amazing idea it is great to see these selfless organisations helping our kids.

[sharlock]

“ ... the vast majority of fatal abuse is perpetrated by someone known to the child, usually a caregiver, and it is rarely intentional or premeditated.”

[sharlock]

After tossing her books on the sofa, she decided to grab a snack and get on-line. She logged on under her screen name ByAngel213. She
checked her Buddy List and saw GoTo123 was on. She sent him aninstant message:
ByAngel213:
Hi. I'm glad you are on! I thought someone was following me home
today. It was really weird!

GoTo123:
LOL You watch too much TV. Why would someone be following you? Don't you live in a safe neighborhood?

ByAngel213:
Of course I do. LOL I guess it was my imagination cuz' I didn't see anybody when I looked out.

GoTo123:
Unless you gave your name out on-line. You haven't done that have you?

ByAngel213:
Of course not. I'm not stupid you know.

GoTo123:
Did you have a softball game after school today?

ByAngel213:
Yes and we won!!

GoTo123:
That's great! Who did you play?

ByAngel213:
We played the Hornets. LOL. Their uniforms are so gross! They look
like bees. LOL.

GoTo123:
What is your team called?

ByAngel213:
We are the Canton Cats. We have tiger paws on our uniforms. They are
really cool.

GoTo1 23:
Did you pitch?

ByAngel213:
No I play second base. I got to go. My homework has to be done
before my parents get home. I don't want them mad at me. Bye!

GoTo123:
Catch you later. Bye

Meanwhile........123 went to the member menu and began to search for her profile. When it came up, he highlighted it and printed it
out. He took out a pen and began to write down what he knew about
Angel so far.

Her name: Shannon
Birthday: Jan. 3, 1985
Age: 13
State where she lived: North Carolina

Hobbies: softball, chorus, skating and going to the mall. Besides this information, he knew she lived in Canton because she had just
told him. He knew she stayed by herself until 6:30 p.m. every afternoon until her parents came home from work. He knew she played
softball on Thursday afternoons on the school team, and the team was named the Canton Cats. Her favorite number 7 was printed on her
jersey. He knew she was in the eighth grade at the Canton Junior High School . She had told him all this in the conversations they
had on-line. He had enough information to find her now.

Shannon didn't tell her parents about the incident on the way home from the ballpark that day. She didn't want them to make a scene and
stop her from walking home from the softball games. Parents were always overreacting and hers were the worst. It made her wish she
was not an only child. Maybe if she had brothers and sisters, her
parents wouldn't be so overprotective.

By Thursday, Shannon had forgotten about thefootsteps following her.

Her game was in full swing when suddenly she felt someone staring at her. It was then that the memory came back. She glanced up from her second base position to see a man watching her closely.

He was leaning against the fence behind first base and he smiled
when she looked at him. He didn't look scary and she quickly dismissed the sudden fear she had felt.

After the game, he sat on a bleacher while she talked to the coach. She noticed his smile once again as she walked past him. He nodded and she smiled back. He noticed her name on the back of her shirt. He knew he had found her.

Quietly, he walked a safe distance behind her. It was only a few blocks to Shannon's home, and once he saw where she lived he
quickly returned to the park to get his car.

Now he had to wait. He decided to get a bite to eat until the time came to go to Shannon's house. He drove to a fast food restaurant
and sat there until the time to make his move.

Shannon was in her room later that evening when she heard voices in
the living room.

"Shannon, come here," her father called. He sounded upset and she
couldn't imagine why. She went into the room to see the man from the
ballpark sitting on the sofa.

"Sit down," her father began, "this man has just told us a most interesting story about you."

Shannon sat back. How could he tell her parents anything? She had
never seen him before today!

"Do you know who I am, Shannon ?" the man asked.

"No," Shannon answered.

"I am a police officer and your online friend, GoTo123."

Shannon was stunned. "That's impossible! GoTo is a kid my age! He's 14. And he lives in Michigan!"

The man smiled. "I know I told you all that, but it wasn't true. You see, Shannon, there are people on-line who pretend to be kids; I was one of them. But while others do it to injure kids and hurt them, I belong to a group of parents who do it to protect kids from
predators. I came here to find you to teach you how dangerous it is
to talk to people on-line. You told me enough about yourself to make
it easy for me to find you. You named the school you went to, the name of your ball team and the position you played. The number and
name on your jersey just made finding you a breeze."

Shannon was stunned. "You mean you don't live in Michigan ?"

He laughed. "No, I live in Raleigh. It made you feel safe to think I was so far away, didn't it?"

She nodded.

"I had a friend whose daughter was like you. Only she wasn't as lucky. The guy found her and murdered her while she was home alone.
Kids are taught not to tell anyone when they are alone, yet they do it all the time on-line. The wrong people trick you into giving out
information a little here and there on-line. Before you know it, you have told them enough for them to find you without even realizing you have done it. I hope you've learned a lesson from this and won't do it again. Tell others about this so they will be safe too?"

"It's a promise!"

That night Shannon and her Dad and Mom all knelt down together and
thanked God for protecting Shannon from what could have been a tragic situation.

I showed this story to my niece as she likes to use chatrooms and I had to take away her access to them as well as msn messenger when I saw her talking to someone that was obviously an older man trawling for kids. She beleived he was a young teenage boy it was obvious to me he was not. It is really hard for kids to recognise these perverts and they really do give out way to much info in these rooms it is scary. The new version of MSN messenger no longer has the option of downloading the conversations to memory like it used to so parents could monitor their children were safe. I never really liked the way the kids talked but I certainly never interfered until I could clearly see a paedophile on line. This is the reason that this safety option needs to be available and we should all encourage this company to reinstate it so we can protect our kids on the net!

[Sharon]

Originally Posted by sharlock

I showed this story to my niece as she likes to use chatrooms and I had to take away her access to them as well as msn messenger when I saw her talking to someone that was obviously an older man trawling for kids. She beleived he was a young teenage boy it was obvious to me he was not. It is really hard for kids to recognise these perverts and they really do give out way to much info in these rooms it is scary. The new version of MSN messenger no longer has the option of downloading the conversations to memory like it used to so parents could monitor their children were safe. I never really liked the way the kids talked but I certainly never interfered until I could clearly see a paedophile on line. This is the reason that this safety option needs to be available and we should all encourage this company to reinstate it so we can protect our kids on the net!

Could you actually tell that there was a pedophile on the net?

[sharlock]

Originally Posted by Sharon

Could you actually tell that there was a pedophile on the net?

Seriously I could and I think that they are pretty obvious so any parent watching could pick them as well. He was asking a lot of questions and was getting pretty inappropriate; when I saw the conversation I sent my niece to bed and took over the chat. He was really evasive with any details about himself and was trying to encourage her to feel angry with her family and saying how MOST adults just don't understand kids but he did. So I said "I thought you said you were only 14?" he goes "well I might be a bit older but I'm really cool and I haven't forgotten what it's like to be young and have everyone trying to tell you what to do." He then starts telling me he has money and flash car and he would love to be a real good friend -no more than that- but he would love to take me out and spend heaps of money on me and treat me like a princess. He said he would let me drink and that it was wrong how adults don't trust kids to drink, that adults are such hypocrites. When I started fishing for details on who he was he started to get suspicious of me and after a while he told me he was going to go. Because I knew he was suss on me I fronted him and told him I knew what he was trying to do and that if I ever caught him messenging my niece again I would report him.

[sharlock]

I don't know why I am recieving these types of emails all the time now maybe it is some kind of pyramid thing but the stories while they may or may not be true certainly are interesting. This one is about personal safety for women not children but I still think it is worth the read.

About a month ago there was a woman standing by the mall entrance passing out flyers to all the women going in. The woman had written the flyer herself to tell about an experience she had, so that she might warn other women.

The previous day, this woman had finished shopping, went out to her car and discovered that she had a flat. She got the jack out of the trunk and began to change the flat. A nice man dressed in business suit and carrying a briefcase walked up to her and said, "I noticed you're changing a flat tire. Would you like me to take care of it for you?"

The woman was grateful for his offer and accepted his help. They chatted amiably while the man changed the flat, and then put the flat tire and the jack in the trunk, shut it and dusted his hands off.

The woman thanked him profusely, and as she was about to get in her car, the man told her that he left his car around on the other side of the mall, and asked if she would mind giving him a lift to his car.

She was a little surprised and she asked him why his car was on other side.

He explained that he had seen an old friend in the mall that he hadn't seen for some time and they had a bite to eat and visited for a while. He got turned around in the mall and left through the wrong exit, and now he was running late and his car was clear around on the other side of the mall.

The woman hated to tell him "no" because he had just rescued her from having to change her flat tire all by herself, but she felt uneasy. Then she remembered seeing the man put his briefcase in her trunk before shutting it and before he asked her for a ride to his car. She told him that she'd be happy to drive him around to his car, but she just remembered one last thing she needed to buy. She told the man that he could wait for her; she would be as quick as she could be.

She hurried into the mall, and told a security guard what had happened; the guard came out to her car with her, but the man had left.

They opened the trunk, took out his locked briefcase and took it down to the police station. The police opened it (ostensibly to look for ID so they could return it to the man). What they found was rope, duct tape, and knives. When the police checked her "flat" tire, there was nothing wrong with it; the air had simply been let out. It was obvious what the man's intention was, and obvious that he had carefully thought it out in advance.

The woman was blessed to have escaped harm. How much worse it would have been if she had children with her and had them wait in the car while the man fixed the tire, or if she had a baby strapped into a car seat.

Or if she'd gone against her judgment and given him a lift.

I think I would have given the guy a lift and not even have considered telling a security guard unless I had some seriously bad vibes. What would you have done?

[sharlock]

jackmclellan.com
Did you know that:

• 1 of 5 girls and 1 of 6 boys will be molested before their 18th birthday.
• 90% of all sexual assaults against children are committed by someone whom the victim knew.
• The typical sexual predator will assault 117 times before being caught.
• The re-arrest rate for convicted child molesters is 52%

I found these statistics on a website run by Ron Tebo.

[Mojave]

This is actually a situation I am having trouble with in my real life. My spouse and I enjoy online games, as does my spouses ex. At my house, the kids are allowed to play the games as long as someone is watching. Recently we learned things are different at the other house, where my steps actually live.

I thought I had taught the kids internet safety (my husband and I are both major geeks and have seen it all) but one weekend while the kids were here, my stepson was ribbing his sister about a 'boyfriend' he met in the game. Of course, he got the response of a loud 'He's not my boyfriend!'. When I reminded her not to give out any information, she said she hadn't, to which my still ribbing stepson giggled that she had (I don't know if that is true or not. He sometimes fibs to get his sister in trouble).

I then reminded her that he could be lying about being a kid and instead be a pedophile. She actually gave me that look kids give you when they think you're completely stupid and said "No he isn't. He tells me he has to log off and do his homework." She actually started to get angry at me when I pressed that yes, he still could be lying.

The unfortunate thing is that I happen to be a stepparent and, like it or not, I think maybe my voice gets lost somewhere in the wind when it comes to my steps. It is a very frustrating situation where there is not a lot I can do if I don't agree with that their real parents (my spouse included) are doing. Were it me, I'd rip the game away and tell her she couldn't play until she learned some common sense. Sadly, my spouse thinks I'm overreacting about it, partly because he doesn't want to start problems with the ex. And the ex is the one who has the kids full time. I only hope this 'boyfriend' actually is 14.

if I may ask, where did this article come from?

[sharlock]

Originally Posted by Mojave

This is actually a situation I am having trouble with in my real life. My spouse and I enjoy online games, as does my spouses ex. At my house, the kids are allowed to play the games as long as someone is watching. Recently we learned things are different at the other house, where my steps actually live.

I thought I had taught the kids internet safety (my husband and I are both major geeks and have seen it all) but one weekend while the kids were here, my stepson was ribbing his sister about a 'boyfriend' he met in the game. Of course, he got the response of a loud 'He's not my boyfriend!'. When I reminded her not to give out any information, she said she hadn't, to which my still ribbing stepson giggled that she had (I don't know if that is true or not. He sometimes fibs to get his sister in trouble).

I then reminded her that he could be lying about being a kid and instead be a pedophile. She actually gave me that look kids give you when they think you're completely stupid and said "No he isn't. He tells me he has to log off and do his homework." She actually started to get angry at me when I pressed that yes, he still could be lying.

The unfortunate thing is that I happen to be a stepparent and, like it or not, I think maybe my voice gets lost somewhere in the wind when it comes to my steps. It is a very frustrating situation where there is not a lot I can do if I don't agree with that their real parents (my spouse included) are doing. Were it me, I'd rip the game away and tell her she couldn't play until she learned some common sense. Sadly, my spouse thinks I'm overreacting about it, partly because he doesn't want to start problems with the ex. And the ex is the one who has the kids full time. I only hope this 'boyfriend' actually is 14.

if I may ask, where did this article come from?

I sympathise completely with your position. I had a similar issue at one time with my stepdaughter. Her mum was sending her over in outfits that were kneehigh boots tiny black miniskirt and black boobtube top when she was 3-4years old. She is a stunning girl and she would look good in a hessian sack but these clothes bothered me because of all the old men who would leer at her as we walked down the street. I used to always take a change of clothes with me when I picked her up to change her into and only put the clothes she was sent in back on when I dropped her home, but like you could not say anything about it for fear of upsetting her mum.
The story was sent to me by email so I have no link for it but can only show that it was a qupte as it wasn't written by me. It wasn't till I exposed this guy she beleived was nearly the same age as herself that she ever started taking me seriously about the ease of adults to pull the wool over kids eyes. They like to believe they know everything and couldn't be tricked that easily. I am from Australia but at one of the schools here they got a policeman to go into the classroom to talk about the dangers on the internet and I thought that was a great idea. I am always flabbergasted by the way some adults don't take this threat seriously due to a lack of understanding. The internet is a gateway to a world of strangers both good and bad. Not only don't the kids know who they are talking to most of the time but the risk of getting involved with strangers rises dramatically because of the ease in talking about personal problems to a faceless poster. perhaps you and your husband should go onto the game site and check it out for yourselves. I think you have done the right thing in warning your stepdaughter and in your position that is probably all you can do. Best of luck! Let me know what happens.

[imanewsjunkie]

Mojave, what a tough situation! It is very good that you are trying to stay aware of what is going on and talking to your stepchildren. The story Sharlock told us about his niece is a very good example of what happens far too often out there. There are some scary statistics out there, like these that were put out by the National Center for Missing and Exploited Children:

According to a study published in 2006, one in seven youth online received a sexual solicitation or approach over the Internet. Sexual solicitations and approaches are requests to engage in sexual activities or sexual talk, or to give personal sexual information, that were unwanted or made by an adult.

• 27% of those who solicited youth online asked youth to take sexual pictures of themselves and send them
• 90% of the sexual solicitations happened to youth ages 13 and older
• 70% of the sexual solicitations were targeted at girls
• 41% of unwanted solicitations happened when youth were with friends or peers
• 56% of the youth who received solicitations did not tell anyone

These statistics and more information can be found in “Online Victimization of Youth: Five Years Later,” published in 2006 by the University of New Hampshire Crimes Against Children Research Center, the U.S. Department of Justice Office of Juvenile and Delinquency Prevention, and National Center for Missing & Exploited Children.

http://www.missingkids.com/missingki...US&PageId=2530

I think NetSmartz411.org is a good site for getting advice on how to talk to kids more about Internet safety. They have some free downloadable guides & resources and they give you the option to ask experts questions. It’s not easy to get kids to take us seriously when we tell them how easily predators can get information out of them-- they just roll their eyes and think that we are out of touch! And I’m sure it’s particularly hard when you are only the stepparent, but keep talking to them and reaching out. Good luck!

[sharlock]

Originally Posted by imanewsjunkie

Mojave, what a tough situation! It is very good that you are trying to stay aware of what is going on and talking to your stepchildren. The story Sharlock told us about his niece is a very good example of what happens far too often out there. There are some scary statistics out there, like these that were put out by the National Center for Missing and Exploited Children:



I think NetSmartz411.org is a good site for getting advice on how to talk to kids more about Internet safety. They have some free downloadable guides & resources and they give you the option to ask experts questions. It’s not easy to get kids to take us seriously when we tell them how easily predators can get information out of them-- they just roll their eyes and think that we are out of touch! And I’m sure it’s particularly hard when you are only the stepparent, but keep talking to them and reaching out. Good luck!

Thanks for the link it is very informative. Nanny programs that close net access as soon as certain terms are used is also a good idea.

[flutterby]

Sharlock,

Thank you for posting all this very helpful information. I have a 13 year old daughter who chats all the time. She thinks that there is no way anyone would lie to her online. Our computer is in a central location in our home and we consistantly watch to see what she is doing and who she is talking to. I hope that by having her read the story about chatting she will start to understand why her bedroom is the last place we will ever have an internet connection.

[imanewsjunkie]

Originally Posted by sharlock

Nanny programs that close net access as soon as certain terms are used is also a good idea.

I couldn't agree more! Internet filters and nanny programs are an excellent tool to use with kids on the Internet.

Has anyone had problems with older kids figuring out how to disarm filters or monitoring programs?

[Charon]

Hi

After 6 years in the SAPD, I took a breather working as a Nature Guide in the Kruger National Park South Africa.

Contrasting the wonders of nature, I was amazed by the wonders of human stupidity. Sounds crass but please bear with me.

Foreigners [thats you ] do not realise that there is no longer a thick glass pane [TV] seperating themselves from African predators when they enter the Park. Therefore they tend to expose themselves to unspeakable horrors without realising what they are doing. [Approuch animals, feed animals, taunt animals, exit vehicles etc.]

Why: The enter a scenario/setup/condition/place which is EXRTRAORDINARY, UNKNOWN, APPEALING, OVERWHELMING. The natural safety meganism are overshadowed by the abovementioned and they do silly things, EXPOSING themselves.

This is what kidnappers and mollestors do:

They [sickos] present a situation/person/condition which is first of all APPEALING [Sell themselves as a nice person], they remove their target, physically by means of bate, emmosionally by being OVERWHELMING, to an UNKNOWN [Pshycological/Physical] place where the target is out of it's water and then they act.
Kids are soft targets since they are still impressionable, gullible and inexperienced. As much as they still believe in Santa, do they not believe in the dark side of human nature. My six year old was flattened by my car radio being removed from of my car parked my garage, while we slept last night. It made me realise how far she was removed from the realities of crime.

We live in a sick world where our children will forever be the victims until we, the adults, start TELLING THE TRUTH. They NEED TO KNOW the truths and realities of life today from us or, God forbid, they will learn it the hard way.

Stop shielding them, is what I say. By protecting their thoughts you might loose them altogether. Hell of a thing I am proposing, but I see no alternative anymore.

[Evening2]

Originally Posted by Charon

Hi

After 6 years in the SAPD, I took a breather working as a Nature Guide in the Kruger National Park South Africa.

Contrasting the wonders of nature, I was amazed by the wonders of human stupidity. Sounds crass but please bear with me.

Foreigners [thats you ] do not realise that there is no longer a thick glass pane [TV] seperating themselves from African predators when they enter the Park. Therefore they tend to expose themselves to unspeakable horrors without realising what they are doing. [Approuch animals, feed animals, taunt animals, exit vehicles etc.]

Why: The enter a scenario/setup/condition/place which is EXRTRAORDINARY, UNKNOWN, APPEALING, OVERWHELMING. The natural safety meganism are overshadowed by the abovementioned and they do silly things, EXPOSING themselves.

This is what kidnappers and mollestors do:

They [sickos] present a situation/person/condition which is first of all APPEALING [Sell themselves as a nice person], they remove their target, physically by means of bate, emmosionally by being OVERWHELMING, to an UNKNOWN [Pshycological/Physical] place where the target is out of it's water and then they act.
Kids are soft targets since they are still impressionable, gullible and inexperienced. As much as they still believe in Santa, do they not believe in the dark side of human nature. My six year old was flattened by my car radio being removed from of my car parked my garage, while we slept last night. It made me realise how far she was removed from the realities of crime.

We live in a sick world where our children will forever be the victims until we, the adults, start TELLING THE TRUTH. They NEED TO KNOW the truths and realities of life today from us or, God forbid, they will learn it the hard way.

Stop shielding them, is what I say. By protecting their thoughts you might loose them altogether. Hell of a thing I am proposing, but I see no alternative anymore.

Yes, Charon, that IS a Hell of a thing you are proposing. But since propose you did, how would you suggest that we, as parents and guardians of our young children, go about telling them this "truth"?

~Evening2

[Charon]

Ok.

I guess more or less the same way you'd go about explaining their puppy's corpse lying in the road. What are you gonna say? "It's only taking a long nap and when we come back from having a milkshake you'll see that it got up and took a loooong walk." Bull!

"Your puppy was not CAREFULL and did and went where it was not supposed to. A VERY bad man who does not care for rules and law [explain both] drove too fast, and ran it over. I'm sure your puppy didn't suffer [explain] and is now walking around with the angels in Heaven. It will ask a one of it's friends to join you soon."

CUT TO THE CHASE or the CHASE is gonna cut into your child! Every child differs and therefore no one give a single set of rules how to break the truth to them.

Our TV's are flooded with soap operas which provides enough tragedy and violence to use as educational material. In stead of allowing your child to sit there absorbing that mindless filth you can join her and start explaining to her what she is looking at. She can remotely now relate, and trust me they do relate to soapies, to CERTAIN conflicts on screen and learn something from it under your quidance without being physically affected. Her mindsett will alter, yes, but it will be up to you, how positively or negatively. Don't wait till they are teenagers, then it's too late and you are uncool and gross.

Don't let your personal inhibitions kill your kid. Your an addult and more or less won the battle up to here. Give them a fair chance to do the same.

[sharlock]

Originally Posted by Evening2

Yes, Charon, that IS a Hell of a thing you are proposing. But since propose you did, how would you suggest that we, as parents and guardians of our young children, go about telling them this "truth"?

~Evening2

Perhaps slowly slowly and pace it at your childs capabilities would be best? It is a difficult thing to do!

[Athena]

Originally Posted by sharlock

I don't know why I am recieving these types of emails all the time now maybe it is some kind of pyramid thing but the stories while they may or may not be true certainly are interesting. This one is about personal safety for women not children but I still think it is worth the read.

I think I would have given the guy a lift and not even have considered telling a security guard unless I had some seriously bad vibes. What would you have done?

Hi Sharlock,

Honestly, I am not a trusting person. I would have asked him for his name and address so I could put a check in the mail for his services but would not have given him a lift. I'm not even sure I would have let him fix my tire. I would have called AAA and just waited in my locked car. JMO

[Athena]

Originally Posted by sharlock

Thanks for the link it is very informative. Nanny programs that close net access as soon as certain terms are used is also a good idea.

My kids are older now, 18 & 21 but I used a filtering program when they were younger but even those programs don't block everything and sometimes they block acceptable websites so they can be a bit difficult to manage. I found that AOL had a pretty good filtering program and before they even used it I made sure their sign on was linked to their correct age. It's also very important that rules are explained in advance. This is a pretty good article also for anyone interested:

http://www.mediafamily.org/facts/facts_internet.shtml

[sharlock]

Originally Posted by Athena

My kids are older now, 18 & 21 but I used a filtering program when they were younger but even those programs don't block everything and sometimes they block acceptable websites so they can be a bit difficult to manage. I found that AOL had a pretty good filtering program and before they even used it I made sure their sign on was linked to their correct age. It's also very important that rules are explained in advance. This is a pretty good article also for anyone interested:

http://www.mediafamily.org/facts/facts_internet.shtml

Thanks Athena,
really good article! I've always been really trusting in the past myself and I still am probably too trusting but I realise the risks entailed with that more and more and it makes me sad!

[imanewsjunkie]

That is a great article-- thank you for posting it! It's pretty clear that we need to stay aware of what our kids are doing and keep talking to them so they understand the dangers that are out there.

[sharlock]

Originally Posted by imanewsjunkie

That is a great article-- thank you for posting it! It's pretty clear that we need to stay aware of what our kids are doing and keep talking to them so they understand the dangers that are out there.

I wanted to draw attention to site that I found really useful when replying to someone "who thought people who promoted stranger danger and couldn't understand that a 6yr old girl may want a sexual relation with a member of her family or freind without any leading on the adults part" were the real problem for children nowadays and not those like Jack Mclellan who start sites giving 'how to' advice for paedophiles! (I know why I worry for my child so much now)
It has really good insights statistics and definitions in it.
http:\\cwasu.org Common Misunderstandings

[sharlock]

Originally Posted by sharlock

I wanted to draw attention to site that I found really useful when replying to someone "who thought people who promoted stranger danger and couldn't understand that a 6yr old girl may want a sexual relation with a member of her family or freind without any leading on the adults part" were the real problem for children nowadays and not those like Jack Mclellan who start sites giving 'how to' advice for paedophiles! (I know why I worry for my child so much now)
It has really good insights statistics and definitions in it.
http:\\cwasu.org Common Misunderstandings

If you are reading this thread then chances are you would also enjoy the thread on Jack Mclellan. Just thought I'd mention it! Also another poster- Zoey mentioned a useful programto monitor your kids computer use.

Spyware is what you want to get rid of on your computer, not install. What you want is a program that tracks what your granddaughter is doing; what sites she is going to. I googled for you, and this is the first one that came up.

http://www.pctattletale.com/

[sharlock]

What you are looking at are screen captures from a video that was found on 10 people the Toronto Police recently arrested in a child port ring bust. The man you see pictured is believed to live in Canada, due to the title of the video, “Canadian Girl”.

You cannot see what is happening in the video, but police describe the video as so heartbreaking, so disturbing, they feel the term “sexual assault” does not do it justice.
To be blunt, this is the face of a pedophile, caught on tape molesting a child.
Pay careful attention to the video, even the background. Does the man look familiar to you?

Does the background, the apartment look like someplace you have been before, or even a style of apartment you have seen. Clues such as this can help narrow the search radius and help police capture this man before he has a chance to videotape his abuse of more children.
Posted by Stephen McCaskill on 6th May 2006
Anyone with information is asked to contact police at 416−808−8500, or Crime Stoppers anonymously at 416−222−TIPS (8477), or online at www.222tips.com.

[DigitalDreamKat]

When my daughter stopped being in my full time care, ie. when she started school at 5, I gave her some not so nice facts about life.

I wasn't brutally honest, because I didn't want to terrify her, but I did tell her enough so she was cautious.

Some of the things I told her:

1. If you are in the school yard and a grown up you don't know comes up and asks you a question, tell them to go and ask a teacher and show them with your finger were the teacher is or where the office is. Do not take their hand and take them yourself.

2. If I'm late in picking you up, go to the office and wait there, or wait with your teacher if she will let you.

3. If someone tries to grab you, scream as loud as you can, "this is not my parent".

4. If a grown up you don't know won't leave you alone, run as fast you can to the nearest teacher in the yard or run to the office.

There was more, I can't think of the rest right now. She took it pretty well and I was impressed with her understanding.

We had an awful incident happen last year. A little girl of 5 was molested at the local library in the library stacks! I'll give kudos to the library as they took immediate action on this and changed the layout of the library, so there were no more hidden corners within sight of the main desk and office.

I hope this is what you were looking for in this thread.

[sharlock]

Originally Posted by DigitalDreamKat

When my daughter stopped being in my full time care, ie. when she started school at 5, I gave her some not so nice facts about life.

I wasn't brutally honest, because I didn't want to terrify her, but I did tell her enough so she was cautious.

Some of the things I told her:

1. If you are in the school yard and a grown up you don't know comes up and asks you a question, tell them to go and ask a teacher and show them with your finger were the teacher is or where the office is. Do not take their hand and take them yourself.

2. If I'm late in picking you up, go to the office and wait there, or wait with your teacher if she will let you.

3. If someone tries to grab you, scream as loud as you can, "this is not my parent".

4. If a grown up you don't know won't leave you alone, run as fast you can to the nearest teacher in the yard or run to the office.

There was more, I can't think of the rest right now. She took it pretty well and I was impressed with her understanding.

We had an awful incident happen last year. A little girl of 5 was molested at the local library in the library stacks! I'll give kudos to the library as they took immediate action on this and changed the layout of the library, so there were no more hidden corners within sight of the main desk and office.

I hope this is what you were looking for in this thread.

That poor little girl. Did they ever catch her molester? What a horrible thing to have happened in a library. I had never thought of a crime like that occuring in a library?
I think you did the right thing talking to your daughter about these things before she went to school, I also had a talk to my son about the same time and explained to him that the bad people who would hurt you don't look any different to nice people its just that something inside them is broken which makes them not realise how wrong it is to hurt others. He is still polite to people but every now and then he decides he doesn't want to acknowledge a smile or a comment from a stranger even if he is holding my hand. A few times I had to stop myself from saying he should reply because he doesn't do it all the time but when he does I think I should respect his decision, perhaps his instincts are better than mine.

[TuscanDreams]

For some reason unknown to me, I posted this in the wrong forum.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Here are some tips from pamphlets I recieved while working in Child Protective Services, and by working with offenders every day, to prevent your children from being victims of abuse or abductions by strangers.

1. Do not allow your children to wear personalized clothing or backpacks while in public areas. This is hard to do, but perpetrators can easily identify your child if they have their name on their shirts. For example, when my kids played soccer, their jerseys has their first name on the front and their last name on the back, along with the player number. A perpetrator could have called out, "Jason" (not my son's real name) come here, your mom asked me to give this to you." And Jason at age 5, would have respected what an adult asked him to do. Then, the perp could have taken him anyhere.

2. Teach your kids to scream, bite and fight if someone attempts to abduct them. The perpetrator does not want to have attention drawn to themselves. If the child gets into a vehicle willingly, it's now a secondary crime scene as the perpetrator will feel empowered as he's on his turf.

3. Cell phones- there are cheap varieties that children can keep on them to allow a signal to be sent to determine their whereabouts. A recent case, Kelsey Smith, allowed the victim to be located and the perpetrator taken into custody.

4. Teach your children to spit. Yes, that's not an error. When children are abducted, DNA can be located in a vehicle easily through spit, due to the numerous cells in the mouth. One case in particular involves a parental abduction and the parent had purchased a new vechicle, which the child had cried into the back seat. The DNA matched to the child and the child was never supposed to be in that vehicle.

[TuscanDreams]

Strategies for Preventing Abductions
Parents often do not provide their children with safety information that could help prevent an abduction. These strategies may help:

Make sure custody documents are in order.
Have ID-like photos taken of your children every 6 months, and have your children fingerprinted. Many local police departments sponsor fingerprinting programs - check if they're available in your town.
Keep your children's medical and dental records up to date.
Make online safety a priority. The Internet is a great tool, but it's also a perfect place for predators to stalk children. Be aware of your children's Internet activities and chat room "friends," and remind them never to give out personal information. Avoid posting identifying information or photos of your children online.
Set boundaries about the places your children go. Supervise them in places like malls, movie theaters, parks, public bathrooms, or while fundraising door to door.
Never leave children alone in a car or stroller, even for a minute.
Choose caregivers - babysitters, day-care providers, and nannies - carefully and check their references. If you've arranged for someone to pick up your children from school or child care, discuss the arrangements beforehand with your children and with the school or child-care center.
Avoid dressing your children in clothing with their names on it - children tend to trust adults who know their names.
Talking to Your Child About Strangers
Talk to your children often about safety. Give your children the basics on how to avoid and escape potentially dangerous situations. Teach them to:

Never accept candy or gifts from a stranger.
Never go anywhere with a stranger, even if it sounds like fun. Predators can lure children with questions like "Can you help me find my lost puppy?" or "Do you want to see some cute kittens in my car?" Remind your children that adults they don't know should never ask children to help or to do things for them.
Run away and scream if someone follows them or tries to force them into a car.
Say no to anyone who tries to make them do something you've said is wrong or touch them in a way that makes them feel uncomfortable.
Always tell you or another trusted adult if a stranger asks personal questions, exposes himself, or otherwise makes them feel uneasy. Reassure children that it's OK to tell you even if the person made them promise not to or threatened them in some way.
Always ask permission from a parent to leave the house, yard, or play area or to go into someone's home.
Keep these other tips in mind, too:

Make sure younger children know their names, address, phone number including area code, and who to call in case of an emergency. Review with your child how to use 911 or local emergency number. Discuss what to do if they get lost in a public place or store - most places have emergency procedures for handling lost children. Remind your children that they should never go to the parking lot to look for you. Instruct your children to ask a cashier for help or stand near the registers or front of the building away from the doors.
Point out the homes of friends around the neighborhood where your children can go in case of trouble.
Be sure your children know in whose car they may ride and in whose they may not. Teach them to move away from any car that pulls up beside them and is driven by a stranger, even if that person looks lost or confused. Develop code words for caregivers other than mom or dad, and remind your children never to tell anyone the code word. Teach your children not to ride with anyone they don't know or with anyone who doesn't know the code word.
If your children are old enough to stay home alone, make sure they keep the door locked and never tell anyone who knocks or calls they are home alone.
If Your Child Has Been Abducted
Because the first few hours are the most critical in missing-child cases, it's important to provide officials with information about your child immediately.

http://www.kidshealth.org/parent/pos...bductions.html

[TuscanDreams]

2 tips that I gave my kids when they were little:

1. A stranger is someone you don't know very well. As most children are molested by persons known to them this.

2. The swimsuit law- no one can touch you where you wear a swimming suit until you are 18 years old.

[sharlock]

Originally Posted by DigitalDreamKat

When my daughter stopped being in my full time care, ie. when she started school at 5, I gave her some not so nice facts about life.

I wasn't brutally honest, because I didn't want to terrify her, but I did tell her enough so she was cautious.

Some of the things I told her:

1. If you are in the school yard and a grown up you don't know comes up and asks you a question, tell them to go and ask a teacher and show them with your finger were the teacher is or where the office is. Do not take their hand and take them yourself.

2. If I'm late in picking you up, go to the office and wait there, or wait with your teacher if she will let you.

3. If someone tries to grab you, scream as loud as you can, "this is not my parent".

4. If a grown up you don't know won't leave you alone, run as fast you can to the nearest teacher in the yard or run to the office.

There was more, I can't think of the rest right now. She took it pretty well and I was impressed with her understanding.

We had an awful incident happen last year. A little girl of 5 was molested at the local library in the library stacks! I'll give kudos to the library as they took immediate action on this and changed the layout of the library, so there were no more hidden corners within sight of the main desk and office.

I hope this is what you were looking for in this thread.

Excellent post DDK

[DigitalDreamKat]

Thank you Sharlock

No, they never caught the molester. The problem was that the girl had grown up here (Australia), while her parents were immigrants, and while they spoke some English, they had trouble comprehending what their daughter was telling them, not to mention she was young and probably didn't have the right words. The incident was reported a full week after it happened because of this.

The point you made about your son, my daughter is exactly the same. She is not shy by any means, but there are some people she just won't talk to, no matter how friendly they seem.

[sharlock]

Originally Posted by DigitalDreamKat

Thank you Sharlock

No, they never caught the molester. The problem was that the girl had grown up here (Australia), while her parents were immigrants, and while they spoke some English, they had trouble comprehending what their daughter was telling them, not to mention she was young and probably didn't have the right words. The incident was reported a full week after it happened because of this.

The point you made about your son, my daughter is exactly the same. She is not shy by any means, but there are some people she just won't talk to, no matter how friendly they seem.

What a shame, it sickens me to think that pervert is still out there right now.
Isn't it funny though that no matter how aware you make your children of stranger danger the urge to reprimand them for not responding to an adult that has acted nicely towards them is so strong. It is something I constantly remind myself of 'people are not always what they seem to be!"